Mum guilt & how to deal with it

I adore my children and I love being a mum, but I am not just a mum.  I have dreams and I have a purpose on this planet beyond my role as a mum.

And I don’t think I’m alone in this.

One of the things I am passionate about is helping women build belief.  Women are unsure that they can do this, they feel guilty taking time away from their family because they feel their obligations start and end with their family.  But we have an obligation to ourselves, if we neglect what we so passionately desire then nobody wins.  When you are bursting to spread your wings and flourish, then you have to set yourself free. 

So many women I talk to don’t believe they can do this.  They ask themselves, “Can I do this?  Can I be successful?  I would like to do something for myself but I’m worried it’ll take my attention away from my kids.  I think I’ll feel guilty investing that time in myself.” And the list goes on…

But you know, I used to feel the same!  But the pull tightened its grip and I gave in.  And you know, I’m so glad I did, because now I see that with this work, I can have both, and so much more.  

Brocklebank Family

I choose my hours, I walk my boys to and from school, and when we have days off school at short notice (like last week’s burst pipe in Hammersmith closing down local schools) there’s no last minute childcare panic because I can hang out with them.  I am so grateful in those moments that I get to be the one to hang out with them, and not have to pay a nanny to do it for me.

At the start of my journey (and still today) I remind myself that I need to make myself a priority – I am worthy of taking care of myself. 

Being a mum and running a business still means I have laundry and grocery shopping so if don’t take time for ME, I will burnout.  And that’s no joke, I have fallen down this rabbit hole a few times, being prone to adrenal fatigue this regularly bites me in the butt if I’m not careful.

And… there’s more to life than laundry and food shopping, I (and you) deserve to be happy and challenged.  Motherhood is a rewarding and beautiful role, but it’s not my purpose.  We are all on this planet to serve a much bigger purpose than motherhood.

It’s healthy for our children to see us go after what inspires us.  I want to role model a healthy, happy mother who chases her dreams and has goals as well.  I still have ‘guilt’ days, and not just with my children but my husband too, I can’t always be 100% ‘wife’, but I roll on my Forgive (from our emotional aromatherapy kit), and get on with it.

I want all women to believe in themselves and be a shining example to their families so they can do what they love AND still have an amazing family life.

So what got me over all that uncertainty and feelings of guilt?  Personal growth and development (and my essential oils to help raise my vibration/mood and manage different emotions – I do this on the daily, it’s a must).  The personal growth that I’ve gone through with my business has changed all aspects of my life.  I wake up every morning completely excited and deeply in love with the life I’ve nurtured and created. 

Having had multiple mental health challenges, I NEVER thought that this was possible, like ever.

This is what I do… I help women believe they can do it, I help them navigate this path.

So, don’t be afraid to start.  Get out of your own way and just do it.

Bridget xo

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